Around 11:30 every day, I start to whine about whether or not we get to eat soon (one of us always makes lunch for the others). We had some extra pumpernickel bread getting in our way, so we looked up what's good on it-- the suggestion of egg salad got the most in-house hurrahs, so we tracked down a recipe and the fun began!
...But it began slowly, because I decided I wanted to replace the dijon mustard in the recipe with a hot mustard my mom always makes as a pretzel dip, and the ground mustard and champagne vinegar have to mingle for 24 hours before you can finish the mustard. 
Here's how you do it, with my mom's blessing:
Momma Carol's Bumped Up Mustard
1 cup ground mustard
1 cup champagne vinegar
3 well-beaten eggs
1/4 cup whole mustard seeds
1 cup sugar
Mix ground mustard and champagne vinegar. Let stand for 24 hours. Add everything else and microwave for 2 minutes. Stir. Microwave for another 2 minutes. Stir. Microwave for ANOTHER two minutes. Stir. Microwave for one more minute. Stir again. The mustard should now be thick and ready to serve (or cool to serve later, or mix into your egg salad).
I can't take credit for the egg salad recipe, so I'll just make another link to it here. It really is magical, although I would suggest you ease back on the sweet relish and add more cayenne. Definitely don't forget the salt and pepper.
Is it dinner time yet?